Motherhood: The Feminine Gift

5.11.03 Message

Gary L. Cox

Walkersville Christian Fellowship

2 Peter chapter 3:1-13, “The second epistle, beloved, I now write unto you; in both which I stir up your pure minds by way of remembrance: that ye may be mindful of the words which were spoken before by the holy prophets, and of the commandment of us the apostles of the Lord and Savior:  Knowing this first, that there shall come in the last days scoffers, walking after their own lusts, And saying, ‘Where is the promise of his coming? for since the fathers fell asleep, all things continue as they were from the beginning of creation.’  For this they are willingly ignorant of, that by the word of God the Heavens were of old, and the earth standing out of the water and in the water: Whereby the world then that was, being overflowed with water, perished:  But the heavens and the earth, which are now, by the same word are kept in store, reserved unto fire against the day of judgment and the perdition of ungodly men.  But, beloved, be not ignorant of this one thing, that one day with the Lord is as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day.  The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.  But the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night; in the which the heavens shall pass away with a great noise, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat, and the earth also and the works that are therein shall be burned up.  Seeing then that all these things shall be dissolved, what manner of persons ought ye to be in all holy conversation and Godliness. Looking forward and hasting unto the coming of the day of God, wherein the heavens being on fire shall be dissolved, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat?  Nevertheless we, according to His promise, look for a new Heaven and a new earth, wherein dwelleth righteousness.”

God has designed motherhood and the feminine gift, and through redemption the Lord has called His people to lay hold of and cherish the gifts that He has designed.  Our lives ought to be marked by a clear manifestation of God’s clear purpose and the affect of the Gospel in our lives as we lay a hold of His purpose in the feminine gift. 

A Help Fit for Man

From the very beginning, God has set forth a sovereign order as it relates to the feminine gift.  In the very creation and then also at the fall, there were two primary purposes that were set forth.  Genesis 2:18, “The Lord God said, that it is not good that a man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.”  Woman was created second and she was created for the man.   He calls it a “help fit for man.”  Woman was taken out of man and she came alongside man and completed man in the purpose God had.  Any woman who tries to escape the divine order is going to harm herself because that is her very design.  You are as God made you and your fulfillment is in the context of that which God has made.

Genesis 3:16  “Unto thewoman He said, ‘I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children;” That word there for labor literally means, “hard, hard work.”  Indeed it is sometimes very painful.  Birth control and the attempt to reduce the pain and all the side affects, is a picture of an attempt to overthrow and reject the order of God.  In responding to it as unto the Lord, there is a question, “Are you willing to receive what God has for you?” 

“…And the Husband shall rule over her… “

 There is also an additional tweak to the feminine gift that we find here in verse 16, “And thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee”.  God added a sixth sense to the feminine character and that was her capacity to discern whether or not the desire of her husband was toward her.  Not only does it relate to herself but it also relates to the husband’s care and concern for the children and the well-being of the family.    

God adds a greater sense of urgency to the woman but with that greater sense of urgency is not necessarily found the capacity to make proper judgment about how to go about satisfying that urgency.  She is aware of the danger, but she needs that ruling, the bringing of order to those concerns by the husband.  That is the singular picture of this relationship where the wives are in subjection to their husbands in everything in the Lord.

1 Timothy chapter 2:9-15. “In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with braided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.  Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection.  But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.  For Adam was first formed, then Eve.  And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.  Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.”  This is an address to Christian women who say that they’re life is a reflection of the work of grace in Christ.

When women are told to dress in modest apparel, modest means “discreet cosmetics” and it has to do with the orderly arrangement of one’s appearance.  The attitude of heart that you wear clothing actually comes out in the manner in which you are dressed.  If your call as a woman is to arrange yourself under God’s purpose for you, then you are going to dress in such a fashion that God’s purpose is reflected in the way you look and not only the way you look but the manner of the way you act.

  Let’s talk about the picture of shamefacedness.  The Greek has the meaning of one who is averting the eyes so that there is a kind of discretion that appears so that when a woman is in public there is a carefulness with her eyes.  There is a sense of casting her eyes apart from direct interaction, from direct confrontation, etc.  What you do with your eyes is the first grounds of flirting.  Flirting has to be dealt with directly because it is a natural thing and the nature that draws out flirting isn’t evil; it is part of God’s plan.  If you are not married, you are going to want to attract someone and the type of web you spin contributes greatly to the kind of bug you catch and if you use ungodly means, you are not guaranteed at all that you are going to have a Godly husband.  It is almost an impossible thing for somebody outside of you to control your flirting because the look of the eye comes from the heart.  God’s glory is a Godly woman’s desire and that woman practices sobriety; she purposes in such a fashion to never present herself in such a way that she looks like she is available.  This kind of thing should not be in our assembly at all, it should not be in our homes, it should not be a part of our lives.

The next word, “sobriety,” has to do with the self-control of our desires.  First, my presentation physically with shamefacedness and how I present myself outwardly. Second, my feelings being under control.  I would like to suggest, based upon Genesis 3:16, that it is the number one battle women face their whole life.  All of the work of the cross in a woman’s heart stems in some way from that tremendous feminine gift; that desire to be desired.  The reality is that the Godly woman learns to control those feelings by Godliness and faith and it is the Gospel that brings conversion to those desires.  The labor of the Christian woman is a constant labor to be sober, to have those desires properly in check.  A mention about the role of fathers as it relates to this particular issue.  What about girls?  Do they not have desires until they are married?  If you have a daughter you know the answer to that question.  A Godly woman will put on herself proper governors to help her have control over the strong desires and the impulses that come. The failure to do that will result in strong-headed women presenting themselves after the anxieties of their heart.  The proper general mechanism for that governance begins at home with the parents, and it is immediately transferred upon marriage to the husband.  If you are presenting worrisomness in whether or not God is going to find you a mate and your focus is on how you look; then you have suppressed the Gospel; your life is denying the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  The nature of the Gospel is ‘I am not ashamed of the Gospel of Christ’.  The preciousness of the Feminine gift is that you have to come to your gift as a woman, “God made me this way.  I am going to put in His hands my case, and I am going to be one of His children that lets righteousness be manifest out of my life, the righteousness of faith.”

The feminine gift is a helping gift.  If you want to build yourself up in your most holy faith and you have the feminine gift, than you need to be about helping those around you.  The multiple good works of a Godly woman are her testimony.  While we are called to have good works as the essence of our ministry, a good work out of fear is no work at all.  Only as we walk in faith and learn to put away fear will we begin to have success and we will begin to say, “I am at rest in God.” 

 Verse11,  “Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection.”  There needs to be an overarching rule of quietness and not directing affairs.  Apparently the woman can learn in the opposite of silence, which is a kind of an anxious, fearful, clamor.  The word silence does not mean you never say a word.  We’re talking about this sense, a spirit of, quietness.  I would like to suggest that a woman who is filled with anxiety is not in quietness.  Quietness demands that fear is brought under control.  Notice that it says, “Silence with all subjection.”  That root word basically means the idea of arranging myself under God’s order and submitting to God’s order instead of my anxiety.  This verse simply means having a quiet heart ready to do what God bids so that fear is set aside and hope in God is established as the walk of my life.